Yesterday was a hard day and I get nervous at hard days because what if they keep coming. What if they get harder and harder? Will I run out of energy, will I look to my ED, as I know it is still happily waiting in the wings. Hoping for its triumphant return. I want to win everyday with my ED, but it is okay not to be perfect. Because I am not perfect and this is among the things that I need to understand and accept. People will not think I am a bad person, they will not get mad at me, they will simply love me and try to help me. I should not feel guilt, but hope that today and tomorrow will be better and I will get better. Each day in recovery is another day that I live the life I want and I choose. I live with the happiness of growing health and strength.
I do hate you ED.
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